food for the day

have you ever longed for that moment of silience, when no one called your name, the phone didn't ring, the dogs are quiet and no one needs anything for that moment. I have longed for that moment for a while. I have never been able to walk away with anyone in my family or extended family needing help. My heart would not allow me to pretend I could do nothing. although it is as much a curse as a quaility, I have always been able to understand speech of those who could not speak clearly, always sewed up that unfixable clothing that someone didn't want to toss, that broken whatnot or furniture, even cars. oh well jimmy asked mom to go to dinner with her and the boys for jakes b-day. just the four of them was the request. jake actually has a girlfriend and she went along too.  so the house is so quiet. it is (for a time)so nice to hear nothing. I would in no way change caring for my mother but I do get tired of not having a life. for the last year I have been cleaning up the Oak st house and redoing almost everything in it. I have gone in two to four hour segments and it has been the most taxing test of all my senses to continue. It is about done. my daughter moved into it although it is not done yet and I hope it is not another mistake. I feel like I am sending her to hell. it is old and delapadated and she will have lots to contend with. but her payment will be less than 300.00 a month so they may be able to deal with life a little better. she needs to learn to not spend on so much junk. but we can hope. I would like to take a week off and be unresponsible for anything, but I am sure that time will come all too soon. life is just really hard right now. God help us all and all our soldiers and the little hungry children. prayers and love to all.